The Affect #3
Be you (easier said than done)
Just be you. What does that even mean exactly? Being "you" sounds easy enough but to actually put it in to practice seems to be a bit of a task at times. Humans adapt according to their surroundings/situation which is a normal reaction to have, but whats the deal when we completely act out of character? Lets take a few scenarios to bring this topic to a better much clearer understanding. Now, lets imagine we have an interview with a prestigious company that we always dreamed of working for. We get dressed up, we groom and prepare mentally for the interview. The interview begins and the interviewer starts to ask questions, we respond to the questions, but how do we respond? Do we respond in the same manner we would with our friends, siblings or parents? of course not. Our speech starts to adjust and our vocabulary all of a sudden graduates from grade school level to an English professor. Posture is upright compared to our normal lackadaisical position, and we are so much more alert as if we were trained guards at Buckingham Palace.
Why do we act like that? why the sudden change in character? Well to get ahead of course. Who in their right mind would not bring their “A game” to an interview? Meeting your girlfriend/boyfriends parents for the first time can be a daunting task, so how do you act when meeting them for the very first time? I’m sure you know the answer (on your best behavior). Going to church Sunday morning, asking for a raise at work, attending a wedding, all examples of situations we tend to adjust our character for the better. So where exactly am I going with all this? Somewhere…eventually. Okay I got it. My point is when we flip sides to please others we usually end up hurting ourselves.
The change in behavior in relation to the examples I mentioned earlier are natural and there’s no harm in that. Its when you get around a certain person or group of people and you become someone other than yourself. This happens often to younger individuals throughout their academic career especially in high school due to peer pressure. This change in behavior is not designated only to the young crowd but relates to all ages (well not so much the elderly from my experience, they’re too old to even give a damn anymore, gotta love old people). Is the feeling of acceptance so important that we are willing to risk who we truly are? Its too much of a burden if you ask me to put on a front just to be with the in-crowd.
Would it be simpler to hang around people that are actually accepting of you and value who you are as an individual, versus hanging around people because they are popular for whatever reason and could care less about you? Every time we go out of our way to be who we are not we kill a small part of our character. You have to understand that the world is a much better place when everyone is not the same. Imagine the world where everyone acts like everyone else, well unfortunately you don’t really have to imagine cause its kind of happening now. Opinions are held captive by our fear to stand out and our urge to fit in is in control. I want and should be me. Being me is the best feeling ever. Its way too much work to be someone I’m not and I honestly don’t have the time for that. Pretending to be someone your not is similar to telling a lie. When you lie you have to keep up with that lie in order to protect the truth from surfacing. You have to remember the lie in case it ever comes up, do your best acting job to make the lie seem real and last but not least, live with the lie. Simply telling the truth and being honest would save you time and your sanity instead of choosing to lie. Just like telling a lie, pretending to be someone your not is such a headache and tons of work. You start to develop a multiple personality and have to juggle all of them depending on who you are around at the time.
Be you, be the best you that you can possibly be. Don’t change for others if its not benefiting you and is putting you in a uncomfortable position. People will notice how wonderful you are when you show them your true self. Trust me when I say, being comfortable in your own skin is one of the best feelings ever. Being yourself is not always the easiest task but its surely one of the best things you can do. Love who you are cause there is no one in the entire world like you, you are truly one of a kind.